


somewhere in neverland

by FleetingWonderland



Category: Dancing with the Stars (US) RPF, Figure Skating RPF
Genre: Emotional Baggage, Epic Friendship, Past regret
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-07-06
Updated: 2014-07-06
Packaged: 2018-02-07 16:19:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1905621
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FleetingWonderland/pseuds/FleetingWonderland
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>the unquantifiable qualms and various regrets of one charles 'charlie' allen white  (a comedic tragedy)</p>
            </blockquote>





	somewhere in neverland

**Author's Note:**

> Real people, not real events.
> 
> Enjoy.

  
_If I could find you now things would get better_  
 _We could leave this town and run forever_  
 _I know somewhere, somehow we'll be together_  
 _Let your waves crash down on me and take me away_

-[Ocean Avenue, Yellowcard](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X9fLbfzCqWw&feature=kp)

* * *

 

Meryl asks Charlie to walk her down the aisle.

Well, sort of.

They order coffees at the Biggby's in Canton and his eyes are drawn to her intricate, yet simple ring as she sips lightly at her chai mocha latte with skim milk.

She's being walked into the seaside ceremony in by her father, she explains, and when she reaches the rows of chairs, she wants Charlie to walk her down the final stretch.

"Because my dad was the main man in my life. Then you, obviously. And now it's going to be Maks," she explains with a serene smile, her eyes bright and excited, and he swallows hard, rising to his feet and pulling her into a hug.

"I'd love to," he says, feigning a smile.

 

* * *

 

When he had knocked on Madison's door in desperation, in hope that she was in there and maybe he could stop her (because she wasn't responding to his frantic knocks on her door), Marissa had opened it instead.

"I thought you'd show," she grouches in her Boston accent, avoiding eye contact and ushering him inside the suite.

"Marissa, have you seen Meryl? Her door is locked and I was just wondering if-"

"She's in the room next door, collecting her thoughts and taking some pictures with the wedding photographer and all. Y'know she just can't wait to be _Mrs. Meryl Davis-Chmerkovskiy_ ," Marissa says sarcastically, rolling her eyes as she clears a path through the crowded sitting room to the door that connects to the room Meryl and Maia had been sharing for the night before the wedding. He sees Maia and Brooke exchange worried glances and watches Madison pull his own mother aside, while Marissa knocks on Meryl's door and checks the lock. A few of Meryl's sorority sisters step out of the mini-crowd in objection, but Marissa holds her hand up and they stop.

"It's open," Marissa says, playing with the ends of her hair and gesturing to him slightly. "If you've gotta say something to her, I'd recommend it be now."

_Whatever that means._

"Thanks, Castelli. Your vote of confidence is awesome," he says sarcastically, and she gives him a cold glare, replicated by Maia and Brooke behind her.

_Tough crowd._

"No problem, White. You need it. Now go," Marissa says, pursing her lips and gesturing again to the door handle.

 

* * *

 

She's sitting in front of a vanity, adjusting her veil as the photographer's camera flashes and clicks behind her, parallel to the inside door Charlie's using. Her hair is perfectly curled, sweeping down her back in a shiny brown wave. Her skirt's train is laid out behind her, and the bridesmaids - Brooke, Maia, Madison, Marissa, and a few of her sorority sisters, along with Cheryl and his own mother, apparently - continue to bustle around in last-second preparations in the room next door behind him.

He opens the door tentatively, poking his head inside, and Meryl's gauzy figure whips around and she breaks into a grin. He steps forward, fully into the room, and the wedding photographer nearly raises a finger in objection, but Meryl shoos her out and Madison intercepts her, shutting the door loudly behind them.

"Charlie," she says joyfully, standing up from the tiny bench and smoothing down her dress with her hands before stepping before him. Her dress is formfitting but modest, her eyes are bright, and her smile huge. Her makeup is minimal, much less than what she wore on the rink or even on the dance floor, and he can't help but notice how beautiful she looks.

"I'm so happy you're here. It's really cool that you're going to be one of the last people I talk to before I get married, y'know? _Married_! I never would've imagined. I always thought I was more of the independent type, but... Maks is persuasive, what can I say?"

She smiles a little to herself and he thinks he can't breathe. His throat feels dry and he forces himself to speak, cracking on the first word he forces out of his throat. "I'm happy too. You look beautiful."

"Thanks! I tried on a ton of dresses - like everything short of Johnny and Tara dragging me on _Say Yes To The Dress_ \- but this one just fit, you know?" she shrugs and smiles widely, and he feels like he's dying.

"Mhm, definitely... Uh, Meryl?" He swallows hard and bites his lip.

"Charlie, what's on your mind? You seem so stiff." Her head cocks to the side, eyes wide with question and he feels horrible for what he's about to do to her.

"You can't. You can't... You _can't_ marry him."

Meryl narrows her eyes, and the happy glow that he had sworn was around her nearly evaporates.

" _What did you say_?" Her voice is lilting dangerously, her jaw harshly set, and he winces in response.

"You can't marry him. He's totally wrong for you. I'm your best friend, Meryl... He doesn't deserve you. You can't."

 

"Look, I know you're my best friend and all, but maybe you should've said something before my wedding day next time." Meryl shuts her eyes, takes a deep breath, and turns away, rubbing her temples and walking over to the window, obviously trying not to look at Charlie.

"Meryl-"

"No, don't ' _Meryl_ ' me. You had years to tell me you couldn't stand Maks, years! I always thought Danica and Peta and Jenna - especially Jenna - were wrong when they told me about your glares, about your jealousy, but I guess they were right. And how stupid of you to wait until my wedding day to tell me we shouldn't be together. This isn't a goddamned Taylor Swift song, Charlie, this is my future and you're just messing it up. All I was when you got married to Tanith was happy for you guys. I planned her bachelorette party! I helped hold up her dress when she had to pee!" Meryl's voice breaks and he feels terrible. "I was nothing but excited for you guys! And sure, it sucks that you got divorced and all, with her constantly being in California for work and stuff, but this... This is my special day, and you, my very best friend, are ruining it!"

"Meryl, stop. I... I..."

"You what?" she nearly screams at him, looking hurt and furious at the same time. " _You **what**_?"

 

"I messed up. Me and Tanith... I messed up," his eyes are closed so he doesn't see her face and only opens them when she begins to yell again. Her eyes are wild, but there's a feeling of pleading behind them too - like she's asking him to stop, because she's already waited too long to hear it all.

"What now? Are you going to tell me that it's been me all along, that I can still run away with you, like in some stupid romcom or a Yellowcard video?" He raises his eyebrows sheepishly and her eyes seem to narrow and roll in absurdity all at once. "We can't just leave this town and run forever, Charlie!" She takes a deep breath and turns back to him, hyperventilating slightly and biting her lip. "I kept her gown safe when you were off on your perfect honeymoon, you know. I was the witness to your marriage license. I caught Tanith's bouquet at your wedding, and Maks caught her garter. By wedding law or whatever, I'm supposed to get married next, and so is he. And we're together, how convenient... But here I am," Meryl says, back to him, but obviously gesturing to herself in her wedding dress.

"A couple of hours to my ceremony, and here you are. Trying to get me to be a runaway." She laughs cruelly, shaking her head while walking back to and sitting back down on the vanity bench, looking at his reflection in the mirror.

 _I look like an idiot_ , he thinks as he looks at his reflection. His hair is grown out because she asked him to, and he should be with Maks and Val and Tony and Clayton and the rest of the groomsmen. He should be in Maks' room trying to calm the guy down, not trying to convince the guy's bride to run away with him.

 

"I'll have you know I almost did pull a Taylor Swift at your wedding. I almost _did_ speak then." Her voice keeps cracking and she sounds gutted to even be admitting it.

"Why didn't you?" he asks quietly, curiosity seeping into every word as he swallows hard, looking at his shoes.

"Because you looked so happy," she says softly. "And I couldn't take that away from you."

She goes silent, standing up and walking to the balcony doors and opens the door, where a warm breeze blows through, making her veil dance in the wind. He can hear her deep breaths and sees her hands shake as they hold onto the railing that overlooks the ocean. The silence is deafening and he feels ashamed of himself for trying to take this away from her, and he steps forward into the open doorway, watching her perfectly curled hair blow sightly in the wind.

"I'm sorry, Meryl. Good luck. I... I think I should go," he says barely loud enough for hear, walking to the door to Madison and Marissa's room - the door that would seal that there's no chance anymore. Maks is a marriage for life type, he knows that. Whatever problems they'd face they'd inevitably work out, probably through passionate sex and Russian curse words, and they'd be happy together.

_Ugh._

He inwardly cringes but doesn't outwardly shudder, because he just feels so _dirty_ for trying to crash her special day because he had made a mistake.

 

"It's okay." She turns out to him and manages a weak smile. "I love you, you know that. And just because I'm getting married doesn't mean I'm going to stop." She pulls him into a hug and he breaks his stiffness and holds her close. He looks over her shoulder and can see the heads of a small group of people finishing setting up their wedding arch, draped in gauzy fabric and white flowers. He swallows hard.

"I love you too, Meryl. _I love you so much_ ," he manages to croak out and she exhales deeply. They stand there for a couple of minutes until he pulls away and looks into her eyes.

"I should probably go. Maks is probably going to launch himself out of the stratosphere if I don't go calm him down," he says hesitantly, forcing the words out.

She laughs lightly and he knows she's forgiven him.

 _Even though I don't deserve it_ , he thinks.

"Yeah. He's probably worried I've hitched a flight back to Michigan and left without a word. He's such a cynic sometimes. Thank you for wishing me luck. I'd need it so I don't fall down the aisle and crash-land with you into a chair. Marina would _so_ not be amused."

 

She pulls him into another tight hug and they stay there until Brooke opens the conjoining door, barging into the room with a phone on her shoulder pressed to her right ear as she makes erratic hand motions.

"Tony wants to know where you are, Charlie! Come _on_!" Brooke says frantically. He and Meryl pull apart and she smiles a tiny smile, maybe with a hint of sadness, when he pulls away. Madison corrals him through the girl's room and he sees his mother raise her eyebrows while Marissa opens to door to push him out. He gestures to his mother for 'later' and she purses her lips and nods, turning to Cheryl and chatting hurriedly. Marissa nearly pushes him out the door, muttering under her breath.

"You, Charles Allen White, are the biggest idiot ever," she whispers to him and Charlie knows that the entire room probably overheard.

 

* * *

 

Maia dashes out behind him to accompany him to the elevator. The clear glass in the elevator shaft shows through to the gallery of the luxurious hotel they're staying at, and it's so shiny he can nearly see his and Maia's reflections. Her dark hair is pulled up in her signature ponytail, and she looks quite pretty in her amethyst bridesmaid dress. Worry is written all over her face, and she keeps picking at her cuticles.

"So," Maia presses while he waits for the elevator to come. "What were you and Meryl talking about? We heard screaming - thin hotel walls and all."

"It's... Complicated," Charlie tries, but can't get out any words beyond that.

Maia twirls a piece of hair around her right middle finger and looks him right in the eyes. "You tried to stop her, didn't you?" Maia asks bluntly, turning to him, but her eyes say they already know her question is the truth. "Tried to stop her and Maks from being whatever." When his eyes widen, she shrugs. "Marissa thought so."

_Damn that Marissa._

 

"More than whatever, Little Shib. _Husband and wife_. That's huge."

"Yeah, I guess."

"Anyways, I was stupid. And wrong."

"You weren't stupid, Charlie. What you are is too late."

"Too late?"

"Oh, Marissa and Madison told me she had a total meltdown at Tanith's bachelorette party about you. I wouldn't know - it was at a bar, and I was only twenty then - but apparently she couldn't dream of understanding anyone as well as you. But that was a couple of years ago. Who knows how she feels anymore. Feelings grow and go and all. And they seem so happy together now."

"Maia, I-"

The elevator finally dings and Maia gives him a gentle shove inside.

"No more time. Go make Maks chill, Clayton's been texting me about how he's been working himself into a heart attack," Maia says frantically as the doors begin to close. "Don't mess up her walk! Keep your shoulders back! They're on floor fourteen! See you later! Good luck!"

 

The doors shut on Maia's sunny but forced smile. Through the glass doors, he watches her grab off her heels and sprint back in the direction of Marissa and Madison's hotel room. He jabs at the button for 14 repeatedly, and when the doors open again, he finds himself face-to-face with the groomsmen, the father of the bride, and the groom himself.

**Author's Note:**

> I probably wrote this because I hate myself.  
> God, I hate myself.
> 
> Other words - this was all supposed to be a one-shot. But I think this is a pretty good cutoff point and I still have quite a lot to write. I have no clue as to how long this is going to be. It'll be as long as I think it calls for.
> 
> It was originally going to be a companion piece to 'Bluebird' but it took on a life of it's own. There's also a lot of stuff I've written between the events of 'Bluebird' and this, but I'm trying to form a cohesive storyline and I'm not feeling too confident on the accompanying material yet.
> 
> Bluebird takes place in June of 2015, and I'd place this around January of 2018. He and Tanith divorced in November of 2017. She'll likely be making an appearance later.
> 
> This is written as if they are retired. I'd say in this headcanon, they won Worlds in Boston in 2016 and then retired. Of course this is not what I want to happen (Pyeongchang or bust, y'all) but that's how you know. Charlie's been working as a coach in Michigan since his split with Tanith, and Meryl's a PhD student at the fancy New York college of your choice (which I'll probably pick cohesively later).
> 
> The song Meryl mentions as a mockery of them running away together is the one at the top. I thought it was fitting.
> 
> Biggby's is a Starbucks-like coffee chain in Michigan. Their frozen hot chocolates are to die for.
> 
> This is a work of fiction. Real people, not real events.
> 
> I hope you enjoyed! I'll be working on the next part hopefully with some semblance of a schedule.  
> -Mara (@nathaliepechalats on tumblr)


End file.
